Tag: Soliloquy

Another painful episode

Rich Pav 6 Comments

To be honest, I’m cringing as I upload this piece of shit. I’m starting to wonder if I’m going to need therapy to work through this. Perhaps the shock of a near-death experience would help put things in perspective. Is there an award for “Most Neurotic Podcaster?” You know those dreams everyone has about being in a crowd and discovering you’re not wearing any pants? That’s what this is like.

But I am really happy with how the videos have been turning out. When nobody is around, I watch them over and over.

And here’s a bonus recording for diehard fans. On the way home I tried to re-record this morning’s episode, but I liked it even less and ended it with an f-bomb. You’ll have to download it manually because if I make a link to two MP3s in one post my RSS feed will barf.

/podcasts/herroflomjapan_060105-2.mp3

OK, I’m going to press the “Publish” button now.

Here I go.

1, 2,

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Two steps forward, one back

Rich Pav 11 Comments

No joke: Trying to kick the procrastination habit is harder than quitting smoking. It’s like how one cigarette leads to another, then another… Wow, imagine how tough it would be to try to get hardcore procrastinators to not just sign up to a support group, but also to attend more than one meeting.

Anyway, I recorded this one while driving.

Update: I didn’t realize the upload prematurely crapped out. Sorry about that. If you re-download the MP3 you’ll get the whole thing this time.

Movie theater and mall photos. Clicky here.

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Last Night’s Leftovers

Rich Pav 3 Comments

Saved my own butt. I recorded a short one last night after finishing work but didn’t get around to uploading it. See, when I got home, the PlayStation controller jumped out of the drawer, stuck itself to my hand and wouldn’t let go. By the time it finally gave in, I was too traumatized to have anything more to do with computers.

Then today I pulled a 12 hr. shift, but I can’t complain because the boss was already there when I arrived and was still there when I left. I don’t know how he does it. He’s a really good guy. But as I was saying, I was too tired to record, so here’s last night’s attempt.

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Today’s Recording

Rich Pav 8 Comments

Ya’ll must getting tired of me ripping on my own podcasts, so I won’t. Just let me say that putting out a recording I really want to redo is downright painful. Under extreme duress, I’m limiting myself to one take. Spalding Grey used to record, listen to and critique his soliloquies over and over until he had them down just right. To me, that’s the proper way. As you might guess, I can spend weeks doing that, and I have to stop. Or at least cut down.

I do like the last two videos a lot, though. I’ve watched them over and over and made my family watch them too.

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Smoking and other disturbing thoughts.

Rich Pav 18 Comments

OK, here’s what I’ve learned so far from this exercise.

  • Before hitting the record button, I need to blow my nose so I don’t punctuate every sentence with a sniffle.
  • When the record light goes on, my brain passes gas. Just call me Rich Pavlov, why don’cha.
  • My inner chickenshit weasel wishes I had said “five” instead of “fifty.”

I think the highlight of this show was the Adam Curry MomentTM when I wasted about 500 man minutes of our collective time by rummaging though my pockets for my subway pass.

I talked about quitting smoking by associating the thought of lighting up with other really disturbing acts you could just as easily do. It’s probably mild compared to other podcasts, but I hope I don’t traumatize anyone unnecessarily.

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Little mistakes, huge consequences.

Rich Pav 11 Comments

Here’s episode two of our recently launched babble-a-thon. A couple of months ago I made a huge mistake at work. The worst I’ve ever made on the job. Funny thing is, it was caused by a very minor error. And I can’t elaborate. But recently, someone else in Japan made just as small of an error that had enormous repercussions.

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New Strategy: Shittin’ ’em Out, Part 1 of 50

Rich Pav 13 Comments

Right. So I’ve come to the conclusion that the anxiety I’m feeling over podcasting isn’t going to disappear. In fact, it’s putting up quite a fight. It’s as if I’m shadow boxing and taking a severe beating. Is that the most embarrassing way to lose or what?

Anxiety won the last match hands down, so I’m taking a different strategy. Self-help gurus would call it, “Feel the fear, but do it anyway,” but I prefer the mantra, “Hey anxiety: Eat shit.”

Like it or not, I’m going to shit out the next 50 podcasts in 50 days. Short ones, about 10-15 minutes each. They might or might not have anything to do with Japan. If they stink, they stink, but over time they’ll improve. I have get over the idea that every performance has to be spectacular, otherwise I’ll continue to accomplish nothing and drive myself even more nuts.

Oh, how I envy people who can drivel, babble and spew their way through episode after episode and not feel the least self-conscious. For me, this is a real challenge, like someone who’s deathly afraid of getting into an airplane deciding to take flying lessons. But it’s our neuroses flaws as much as our strengths that make us interesting and unique, right?

It’s time to start kickin’ fear in the nuts.

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